“So You Think You’re Good Enough To Sit In My Chair” 

By Isobel Smith 

People often ask me which Patrick McGoohan film is my favourite, well the above quotation may give a clue. 

It is in fact, Hell Drivers made by Rank in 1957 and apart from Patrick there is a host of well-known faces in the cast, some on the brink of international stardom and others established character actors.

The story involves Tom Yately (Stanley Baker) who has just come out of prison after causing an accident which badly crippled his younger brother, Jimmy (David McCallum).  He finds a job driving for Hawletts, run by a corrupt manager called Cartley (William Hartnell). He makes friends with Gino (Herbert Loin), an Italian who tells him that Hawletts is running a racket headed by Cartley and the foreman and leader of the drivers, a mean, cruel man called Red (Patrick McGoohan).  Gino also tells Tom that his only other friend, a man called Lugoobin was killed by Red because he found out that the company was dodgy and that he was in love with Lucy (Peggy Cummins), Cartley’s secretary. 

Tom joins the Hell Drivers’ and lodges in a house run by Ma West (Margery Rhodes) and her niece Jill (Jill Ireland).  Later on Tom’s first evening he learns that he has to make a certain number of deliveries during the day; if not his money will be stopped.  He makes an enemy of Red by sitting in his chair at the cafe where the men eat. 

The men hold a competition each week to see who has made the most runs or deliveries during the week. The prize is a gold cigarette case and seems to be won every time by Red who is found to be taking a short cut, dangerously close to the edge of a nearby quarry. 

When Lucy admits she also knows of Red and Cartley's fiddles and tells Tom that she has fallen in love with him, Tom is worried that his friendship with Gino may be in jeopardy. 

Because of his friendship with Gino, Red decides that Tom must go like Lugoobin and try to push him off the road.  Tom decides that he must try to beat him at the number of deliveries, even going along Red’s short cut through the quarry. 

On his weekend off, he goes home to Wales and gives half of his money to his brother who runs the newsagents owned by their mother.  Mrs Yately returns to see this and tells Tom to leave as she believes Tom the cause of Jimmy’s injuries. 

When he returns to work, Tom’s truck is sabotaged and he narrowly avoids being hurt.  Later on, Gino suggests to Tom that they swap the numbers on their trucks so that Red will go after Gino instead of Tom, leaving Tom to get all the money.  Tom tells his friend it is too dangerous an idea to consider. 

Red does go after Gino and pushes him off the road, the truck bursting into flames.  Tom, unaware of his friend’s accident decides to leave when Lucy catches up with him with news of Gino’s horrific injuries.  The two of them go to the hospital to learn that Gino only has a few minutes to live.  He tells Tom that he did swap the numbers and he knows that Lucy loves Tom and not him. 

Sadly, Gino passes away and Tom returns to Hawletts and takes Red’s truck.  Red does not notice this as he is confronting Cartley with the news he has killed Gino and wants more money to keep quiet about this and their fiddle.  Cartley refuses and, as he does so, spots Tom taking Red’s truck.  He tells Red who grasps him by the wrist and tells Cartley they must also get rid of Tom.  They take the only truck in the yard at the time which is the one Gino crashed in.  They follow Tom across the quarry road trying also to push him off but to Cartley and Red’s horror the brakes fail and the truck rears over the roof of the quarry.  Moments before certain death, Red notices the key ring in the truck - it reads thirteen, the number of the truck Tom used and Red sabotaged. 

The use of numbers is very significant in this film, with the most important driver given the number plate ‘1'.  It is a pleasant surprise to note that, as he is the foreman of the drivers, Red has this number plate and Red is portrayed by Patrick McGoohan whose future performance in a certain television series is also dictated by numbers. 

Apart from Patrick, there is a host of familiar faces behind the various characters including, in my opinion, the best-ever James Bond, Sean Connery, Stanley Baker, David McCallum (the future lllya Kuryakin, Man from UNCLE.) and his wife-to-be, Jill Ireland, Sid James, Alfie Bass, Gordon Jackson, Wilfred Lawson (starring later in the Danger Man episode, Not So Jolly Roger), Herbert Loin and William Hartnell (soon to be cast in a new sci-fi series, Doctor Who). 

This film is packed with edge of seat effects from the title sequence to the final chase between Tom and a highly deranged Red.  I enjoy this film a great deal and it still comes up fresh every time even though it was made in black and white.  I think if it had been made in colour, it would not be half as effective.  The lead performances are excellent and all the cast seem to be enjoying themselves, both Patrick and Stanley Baker give their all.  Patrick (I think I may be biased) makes a terrific villain then and now.  It also made a change to see Stanley Baker play a sympathetic role instead of a villain such as in the films Campbell’s Kingdom and Knights of the Round Table). 

I always make a point to watch this film when it is repeated on television even though I do have a copy of it in my video collection. If you have never seen it before I recommend it .